Let me say, first, that I’m bald. Not balding, or going bald, it’s done. I’m bald as fuck. I don’t have male-pattern baldness, other men have me-pattern baldness.
You make a decision, when you first start going bald, whether or not you want to apply hair-regrowth chemicals to your head for the next forty years. I decided not to. At $40 for a three-month supply, I’ve saved $2400 since I started losing my hair, which is enough to buy a really fucked-up car.
So, young men, going bald, think about it… do you want to keep the hair on top of your head or do you want a car that’s a piece of shit? When you see me driving around town in my piece of shit car, ask yourself if you made the right decision.
Let me admit that I haven’t read “Cosmo’s Sexiest Stories Ever: Three Naughty Tales,” but I’d imagine it goes something like this.
Caroline touched Gregory’s weenie lightly, with her fingernails, because she knew it drove men crazy. “Wow,” Gregory said. “Wow, a lot, those fingernails are sexy.” Caroline smiled, and then took about 6 ice cubes and rubbed them on his huevos.
“That’s a cold and sexy huevo!” Gregory screamed. “Get that huevo mega sexy!” He leaned back, and sighed, and said “I’m definitely taking the kids to soccer tonight. You just relax and have a hot bath.”
Caroline smiled. It was so mega sexy for her man to do that. “You’re cooking dinner, too,” she purred, rubbing another ice cube on his huevo.
Oh. My. Gawd. The commentary is gold.
Suck It Up, Buttercup
Husband left on deployment this morning. I came home, had a good cry and a nap, and now it’s time to pick myself up and move on. I’m going to do some major home unfucking and reorganizing, and come up with things to keep me busy. I’ll go back to the gym on a regular schedule, and come up with things to look forward to so the next 7 months don’t draaaaag.
Ugh. Husband left on deployment this morning and this is making me cry.Goodbye at Pennsylvania Station, c. 1944. via: Retronaut
Sons of Anarchy Casts Harold Perrineau -- Season 5 →
Yessssxxx
Sons of Anarchy has tapped Harold Perrineau to join the Season 5 cast in the critical role of Damon Pope.
The Lost vet will play the ex-drug kingpin whose daughter was murdered by Tig in the Season 4 finale, creating what series creator Kurt Sutter recently called a “clusterf***” for Jax and SAMCRO.
FASCISTS, MAN. PASSING ALL THEIR LITTLE LAWS. LAYING DOWN THEIR LITTLE RULES. RESTRICTING MY FREEDOMS.
“YOU CAN’T SMOKE POT IN FRONT OF A DAY CARE CENTER.”
“YOU CAN’T ROLL A JOINT AT 7-11.”
“YOU NEED TO GET A JOB IF YOU’RE GOING TO LIVE IN MY HOUSE. AND STOP SMOKING WEED IN THE SHED. YOU’RE 28.”
“DON’T LIGHT THAT RIGHT NEXT TO THE PROPANE TANKS. YOU’LL KILL US ALL.”
I BET YOU DIDN’T TAKE THE POOL INTO ACCOUNT WHEN YOU WERE PLANNING YOUR LITTLE OPPRESSIONS.
IT’S CALLED MARITIME LAW, MY FRIENDS. YOU CAN’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO HERE.
Bahahaha
Oh man
Walkers crew is just hopeless without him. What a bunch of dunderheads. Everything is going to shit.
I really appreciate the use of “dunderhead.” I’m finding a way to work that into conversation.
